Can you really make him want you or is that just a pipe dream cooked up by people who want to sell how-to books?

Would you like to know how to make a guy want you?I mean just you.  Would you like him to desire you so much he’d move heaven and earth just to have you?  Are you ready for a deeper relationship with him than you could ever have imagined?

You can have everything in life you want, if you will just help other people get what they want.

—Zig Ziglar

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The fact is, most of us do not get what we desire in life because we try to hard to get it, or we try the wrong way. Most women who want to get a man to love them deeply go about it the wrong way.  When a woman learns to focus on his feelings, experiences, ambitions and thoughts instead of her wants, worries and fears then magic happens.

She can create in him a desire so strong that he will do anything to please and keep her.  She will erase the thought of any other woman from his mind and become the center of his attention and relationship.

Choosing Is Everything

We can’t go any further without discussing who you are hoping will want you.  This is a very important factor because if you get this wrong then all of this is a nonstarter.  You need to understand if you have a lot in common with him or not.  I am not  talking about having the same opinions and thoughts as each other since that would be boring.  I am asking, do you come from similar backgrounds and experiences? Are you close to the same age?  Do you hold similar spiritual beliefs? Do you have similar financial goals? Do you vew children in a similar way? All of these factors relate to how much you will be able to relate each other in the long run.

You won’t be able to have long, deep conversations, shared humor, and a lasting relationship if you don’t have a broad base on which to build.  Hot looks only go so far and last only so long.

So, don’t fixate on your own wants, worries and fears since this will effectively render you blind to true love and will never get him to want you.

The Chemistry of Desire

The fact is that most guys are initially attracted to woman physically. This, however, is only the beginning, but since we must always start at the beginning allow me to let you in a few secrets about guys.

You have probably seen pop cultures image of a man as a gland which expresses itself the moment some manufactured, air-brushed, Barbie walks in the door.  It is true that men notice the bomb-shell, but few ever have the courage to talk to her.  She is more of an icon to them than a real person.

What will drive a man to actually approach a woman is far different than what will make him want to poke his buddies and wolf-whistle.

Here are the factors that deeply attract a man.  Self-confidence, a sense of humor, kindness and consideration.  He also will notice clothes that match your body style and that their colors that match your hair and skin.  Don’t wear that little black number if your body doesn’t fit it perfectly.  If you haven’t learned what your colors are, how to choose clothes that compliment you figure and how to choose and apply make-up that enhances your particular features, then do so right away.

It is not a matter of being a fashion model, but of enhancing what you already have.  Men will notice you more when you are genuine, self-confident and comfortable in your own skin than they will an air-brushed super model who is only into herself.

To Make Him Want You Isn’t About Sex

The truth be told, sex is easy to come by in our modern world and trying to use it to make a deep connection with a man won’t work by itself.  If you are merely looking for physical hook-ups then stop reading now.

If you want him to desire you, to want you more than any other woman in the world then you need to ask yourself, What do I bring to the table besides sex? What is it a man wants from a woman more than sex?

The answer turns out to be pretty simple. Men want to matter. Their dirty little secret is that they often feel inadequate and that their existence is pointless, meaningless and insignificant.  Our modern society hates men and constantly mocks masculinity.  Just think about who the buffoon is in most modern comedies and TV commercials.

Starting in kindergarten boys are taught in so many subtle ways that masculinity is bad and being a male is bad.  This results a a lot of men being in crises today and are unable to deal with it.  If you want to really reach a man, then forget what you want from him and spend your effort inspiring him to achieve his “mission” in life and to realize his potential as a man.

Wham! you will have him go mad for you.  You will become his greatest desire in life.  By helping him get what he wants, you will receive ten fold what you want.

Physician, Heal Thyself

Here I must stop and examine a really important truth and that is none of this is possible if you are stuck feeling needy and frustrated with men.

The more you are focused on your own wants and needs the less likely you will ever get what you desire and the less likely he will want you.  Zig Ziglar’s quote at the beginning of this article is true and it may be that you need to take some time out to get yourself together before you seek a lasting relationship.  Sure, there are a lot of twisted, narcissistic men out there, but there are plenty of decent ones too that are looking for the same things you are.  It is just a matter of having the vision to see them.