Category Archives: make him want you

Why Not Get A Great Guy

know menWhen I was a younger guy, I used to try to copy what I believed was a cool macho attitude toward women.  I’d swagger, use really stupid cliched pick-up lines on them.  I once actually said, out loud, to a girl, “If I told you you had a great body, would you hold it against me?”  My toes are curling now just thinking about that.  To top it off, I used to sit and wonder what was wrong with me, why couldn’t I have a girlfriend like other guys did?

I guess we’re all humans—some of us more than others—we all make blunders because we accept mistaken assumptions that we have developed.

These false beliefs make us terribly ignorant of the fact that our miss-informed actions and decisions will lead us to failure!

And guess what? This may not be a disaster in and of itself if we learn from these mistakes learn what not to do next time. Still, don’t you want to NOT make these crazy choices in the first place?

Not only can you get a guy, but you can get a GREAT guy.  Yes, they are out there when you learn to look in the right places and you unlearn all of the myths that have been sabotaging you at every step.

Unlearning is as important as learning

You must start by UNLEARNING all of your incorrect beliefs that inhibit your better judgment.  It is like the first time I bought an old house to flip.  I thought I’d go in and ding it up a bit and then sell it for a good profit.

I spent days just trying to patch up and smooth over holes in the walls and then there were those stains.  I would paint over them a dozen times and like ghosts in a horror movie, they’d show up through the new paint.  This happened even when I used industrial strength primer and stain-block!

p_SCTC_088_04In the end I had to tear out all of the old wall board, rip up all of the old carpet and basically strip the house down to its studs and floor joists, but then it became easy to make the place look brand-new again.  So you need to unlearn or tear out all of your old misconceptions that you have learned about men.

Since these misconceptions are so deeply rooted it is impossible for us to identify them all. Especially since we created them. So what is to be done?

Luckily, it just takes another pair of eyes to see the fallacies that drive us towards perfectly stupid mistakes. I love creating music and I have a small home studio.  I have learned that when I work hard on a song for too long it begins to sound great—the only problem is that it sounds great only to me.  The next day when I cue it up and hit play, crap comes out of the speakers.

You need a fresh perspective and another set of eyes to look at your relationship challenges so visit the link below.

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“If Only I Could Understand Men….”

How well do you understand men?

All of my guy friends seem to agree that they can’t understand women, and that women are so complex and, in fact, this is true for most of us guys. As I have talked to many women, I find that they think the same things about men. Most of the women I have talked to about this say they would give anything to understand what makes a man “tick.”

The good news is, is that men are not really all that complicated, the truth is that women apply there templates to men which makes them seem complicated.  The real problem with women understanding men has to do with feelings and emotions.  Men don’t easily share these things verbally, but if you know the signs they will quickly tell you exactly what his emotions are.

Here is a rather quick overview of 3 things that most women do not know about us guys and would never in a million years guess.  In fact, once I reveal them many of you will wonder if this possibly could be.

1) Men are more sensitive than women.

Clark Sensitive GuyWhat? I can hear you exclaiming. To understand men you need to know that men don’t have the ability to share their emotions the way woman do and thus they can’t recover from emotional trauma as effectively as a woman. This results in, most men shutting down from as a protective measure. When a men have suffered deep emotional trauma and then hear words to the effect that “he should just let his feelings out,”  or that he should “share” his feeling more, he feels that if he lets his feelings out, he will be judged as less of a man, or in some cases he won’t be able to control them.

2) Men hate fighting.

For men, there is a difference between conflict and problem solving. Fighting, for guys, means someone has to win and the other needs to lose. Also, guys prefer conflict that is non-emotional so that there is no danger of losing control of their emotions. If conflict gets emotional, such as in an argument with his girlfriend of wife, it is very difficult him to control his feelings and that is why we guys  become quiet and withdrawn. I know this “silent treatment” seems personal to a woman, but in most cases it is simply a guys way f not being out of control.

3) Men want to get married.

Our modern media portrayal of men views them as moronic glands always seeking to be expressed when the truth is that most of men get married. While the “freedom” of bachelorhood is portrayed as one wild party, in reality, it is lonely. And while we are on this subject, when asked, the majority of men said that finding a trustworthy woman was as important or even more important than finding one that was “hot.”

If you liked these 3 truths, there are more available in Bob Grant’s insightful e-book, “The Woman Men Adore…and Never Want to Leave.”

Bob Grant, L.P.C., put his 17 years of private practice as a Licensed Professional Counselor and Coach into this, powerful handbook.

His years of practice has revealed what men find powerless to resist in a woman. You can have this information simply by clicking here.

Can You Really Make Him Want You?

Can you really make him want you or is that just a pipe dream cooked up by people who want to sell how-to books?

Would you like to know how to make a guy want you?I mean just you.  Would you like him to desire you so much he’d move heaven and earth just to have you?  Are you ready for a deeper relationship with him than you could ever have imagined?


You can have everything in life you want, if you will just help other people get what they want.

—Zig Ziglar


The fact is, most of us do not get what we desire in life because we try to hard to get it, or we try the wrong way. Most women who want to get a man to love them deeply go about it the wrong way.  When a woman learns to focus on his feelings, experiences, ambitions and thoughts instead of her wants, worries and fears then magic happens.

She can create in him a desire so strong that he will do anything to please and keep her.  She will erase the thought of any other woman from his mind and become the center of his attention and relationship.

Choosing Is Everything

We can’t go any further without discussing who you are hoping will want you.  This is a very important factor because if you get this wrong then all of this is a nonstarter.  You need to understand if you have a lot in common with him or not.  I am not  talking about having the same opinions and thoughts as each other since that would be boring.  I am asking, do you come from similar backgrounds and experiences? Are you close to the same age?  Do you hold similar spiritual beliefs? Do you have similar financial goals? Do you vew children in a similar way? All of these factors relate to how much you will be able to relate each other in the long run.

You won’t be able to have long, deep conversations, shared humor, and a lasting relationship if you don’t have a broad base on which to build.  Hot looks only go so far and last only so long.

So, don’t fixate on your own wants, worries and fears since this will effectively render you blind to true love and will never get him to want you.

The Chemistry of Desire

The fact is that most guys are initially attracted to woman physically. This, however, is only the beginning, but since we must always start at the beginning allow me to let you in a few secrets about guys.

Make Him Want YouYou have probably seen pop cultures image of a man as a gland which expresses itself the moment some manufactured, air-brushed, Barbie walks in the door.  It is true that men notice the bomb-shell, but few ever have the courage to talk to her.  She is more of an icon to them than a real person.

What will drive a man to actually approach a woman is far different than what will make him want to poke his buddies and wolf-whistle.

Here are the factors that deeply attract a man.  Self-confidence, a sense of humor, kindness and consideration.  He also will notice clothes that match your body style and that their colors that match your hair and skin.  Don’t wear that little black number if your body doesn’t fit it perfectly.  If you haven’t learned what your colors are, how to choose clothes that compliment you figure and how to choose and apply make-up that enhances your particular features, then do so right away.

It is not a matter of being a fashion model, but of enhancing what you already have.  Men will notice you more when you are genuine, self-confident and comfortable in your own skin than they will an air-brushed super model who is only into herself.

To Make Him Want You Isn’t About Sex

The truth be told, sex is easy to come by in our modern world and trying to use it to make a deep connection with a man won’t work by itself.  If you are merely looking for physical hook-ups then stop reading now.

If you want him to desire you, to want you more than any other woman in the world then you need to ask yourself, What do I bring to the table besides sex? What is it a man wants from a woman more than sex?

The answer turns out to be pretty simple. Men want to matter. Their dirty little secret is that they often feel inadequate and that their existence is pointless, meaningless and insignificant.  Our modern society hates men and constantly mocks masculinity.  Just think about who the buffoon is in most modern comedies and TV commercials.

Starting in kindergarten boys are taught in so many subtle ways that masculinity is bad and being a male is bad.  This results a a lot of men being in crises today and are unable to deal with it.  If you want to really reach a man, then forget what you want from him and spend your effort inspiring him to achieve his “mission” in life and to realize his potential as a man.

Wham! you will have him go mad for you.  You will become his greatest desire in life.  By helping him get what he wants, you will receive ten fold what you want.

Physician, Heal Thyself

Here I must stop and examine a really important truth and that is none of this is possible if you are stuck feeling needy and frustrated with men.

The more you are focused on your own wants and needs the less likely you will ever get what you desire and the less likely he will want you.  Zig Ziglar’s quote at the beginning of this article is true and it may be that you need to take some time out to get yourself together before you seek a lasting relationship.  Sure, there are a lot of twisted, narcissistic men out there, but there are plenty of decent ones too that are looking for the same things you are.  It is just a matter of having the vision to see them.


Make Him Desire You: What You Are Missing

quoteSome say that one-sided love is better than none, but like half a loaf of bread, it is likely to grow hard and moldy sooner.closequote

how to make him desire youDo you feel invisible  to that certain guy you wish would want you? Would you like to know a way to make him to desire you without risk of rejection? Would you like to learn how to keep his desire for you burning hot for a long time to come? Would you like him to have eyes for you only?

The problem is that so often the guy you wish would desire you either doesn’t seem to know you exist or there seems to be no way to go beyond friendship with him.  No matter how many signals you give, he is blind to them and you don’t want to push too hard because then he’ll probably run.  Plus, you don’t want to be that “desperate” woman who chases men.

Psychiatrist Eric Berne writes in his book “Sex in Human Loving that “Some say that one-sided love is better than none, but like half a loaf of bread, it is likely to grow hard and moldy sooner.”  Some people say that the solutions is to just forget it and move on.  But that is easier said than done because love is something that is not easily controlled.

Can You Make Him Desire You?

There is another possibility and that is to make him desire you.  “Is that possible,” I can hear you say.

make him want youThe answer to that is that there are certain women that can and do make men fall all over themselves to get their attention.  Contrary to popular belief, it is not merely “hot looks”.  In fact, in a recent survey of guys the number one thing they first noticed in a woman was eye contact.  Yes, you heard it right, eye contact.

Next came the way she carried herself.  Confidence and a great sense of humor and fun were highly prized by men and they found these traits extremely sexy.  In fact, a recent study indicated that women were more visual than men when it came to checking each other out.

So, the fact is, if you could learn the secret of how these women make men desire them, you certainly can make a man desire you.

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Make Him Want You: Six Powerful Steps

#1 Looking Busy Makes Him Want You

What ever you do, don’t let him think you are pining away the hours waiting for him to call you—even if you are. Now is the time to take up a hobby or busy yourself in someway that doesn’t include him.

Make sure he knows how busy you are and how full-filled your life is. This alone will pique his interest in you and make him want you all the more.

#2 Like Water Off a Ducks Back

water Even if his lack of attention bothers you, shrug it off as fare as he is concerned. Whining to him about his lack of attention will get you one thing—less attention.

Don’t ever start in on him about the way things used to be or ask him why things aren’t the way they used to be. Men HATE relationship questions.

Remember that hormones will drive the first part of any relationship, but relationships are not static. They progress and just like the seasons change with time, so does a relationship.

This means that there should come a time, naturally, where you are both comfortable enough and secure enough that you don’t need to be with each other 24/7

#3 Tease Him

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Look, men are visual and once you understand what his turn ones are, you’re going to havemake_him_want_you him wanting you all the time. Surprise him when he comes home by wearing something sexy.

Experiment with things, starting with things that make you feel sexy. When you feel sexy, it will probably translate to him.

They say a way to a man’s heart is through his stomach but believe me they missed a little bit north on that one.

Women have the power in any relationship if they only understand how to wield it. Men will melt at the skillful touch of a woman.

This is one of the most misunderstood truisms about the relationship between men and women.

#4 Look Ma’velous Dahling

No matter what your body size or shape, look your best. This will communicate to him the type of person you are. Plus, there is that visual thing with men that I have already mentioned. Looking your best will definitely help him want you.

#5 Grab The Bull By The…Horns

Don’t always just sit and wait for him to take the initiative. Try leaving a note for him to meet bull you at a favorite restaurant with “fun to follow.”

Surprise him with a costume and roll playing. These are only two things you can do, but you need to make sure you know him well enough to pull this off. Once you do he is going to want you even more.

This technique can really be powerful but it can backfire if you are not well prepared and understand what turns him on. Use it carefully.

#6 Bring The Ego Pump

Most men have alarmingly deflated egos and they constantly hide this fact from women. So, observe him and make mental notes about what he is proud of. Make mental notes about what you genuinely admire about him. Then drop compliments about these things. The secret is to be genuine and not over do it. One or two compliments will suffice.

Guys will claim they need “guy time”, a time to be with their buddies of by themselves. This may be true and you can just leave it at that or you can light such a fire in him that his “guy time” all but vanishes! You can do this with out nagging him about your relationship.

To do this, just let him see you confident independent side. Not in a revengeful way, but in a natural way. If he sees a confident sexy girl willingly walking away from him to do something else, it’s going to awaken the hunter in him and make him want you bad.

These six important ways to make him want you are just the beginning of a powerful technique to make him obsessively desire you.


Chris is a freelance writer and life coach.  You can learn how to make him desire you at